I remember the first phone I fell in love with, it happened in the spring of 2006. At the time, I was an undergrad and had started one of those jobs that only suited students. I was a coat attendant at the Student’s Union Bar. A job that redefined what it means to be patient and polite. Apparently, people don’t like waiting to get their coats and always believe you should remember their unique and stylized H&M coat.
So, I had been doing this job for a few months and had earned some money, which changed things spectacularly. Oh! To remember the days when £20 felt like a bounty.
My job as a coat attendant -I know there was an official name for my position, but I can’t seem to remember and I’m afraid I don’t want to- meant I could finally get this beloved phone.
Fortunately, my previous phone gave up the ghost giving me all the permission I needed to buy what I really wanted not what I was expected to want.
You know that feeling, when you want to buy something, and you feel your mum and Dad and that nosy aunty are behind you watching your every step?
For the most part, I had been frugal with money, some would say I was stingy (case in point, my brother) but potato, potato, right? I may have been tight with money, but this was usually on everything except food. But in the spring of 2006, I felt a shift, or I should call it a loosening of the reins.
Perhaps, my reluctance to spend had only been because there was very little to spend. But as I received those paychecks, pictures and desires that had never really been there, started their descent. Suddenly, I wanted as many of the beautiful things as I could find or afford. Whichever was possible.
I have often heard that money is one of the surest ways of showing one’s true character. If so, then it would mean that my character had all along been hidden in the sales sections of stores, mediocre meals and long nights spent in my dorm room with nowhere to go.
But, I would rather say that money amplifies what was already there or more like it uncovers the drogdy material of our character and identity.
I certainly didn’t remember any of this in that moment when I walked into the store to select my new phone. It had been the same store where I bought my previous phone, a few years before. It was still the same gentleman behind the counter, but I was sure he wouldn’t remember me. Unlike the coat clients at my job, I wasn’t under the illusion that he would remember my purchase.
I had an idea of the phone I wanted; it had been advertised continuously on my friends’ TV. At this time, I did not yet have the luxury of a television. I only watched this during nights spent with these friends. Three of them had gotten a big house close to school, which was automatically declared the hangout place.
It was a pink and white Motorola phone that you could flip to either side. Yes, at one time Motorola was all the rage, with people bursting into the Motorola theme song – Hello Moto.
Simpler times, it seemed.
The phone had a circular screen that would often light up when you moved it. It was beautiful and I wanted it.
I find it interesting that the color did not deter me. At the time, I was known to avoid pink things except it was necessary. Yet, I was willing to come out of this self-imposed pink exile for a phone I could ill afford but needed to have.
Since then, I have realized the uncanny connection one has with a ‘mobile’ device. It has been called an appendage –I’m not sure I’ve actually heard anyone say this, but it just seems like what one would say, perhaps a scientist considering the human connection to mobile devices. For me, it was its beauty.
Perhaps I was suffering from the shiny object’s syndrome though on further thought, said syndrome would not apply in my case. Yet, this phone called to me.
I believe phones should be given their own moniker, man’s best friend, perhaps? It has certainly surpassed dogs and all other pets in its impregnable place in our lives.
Or maybe we should call it man’s worst enemy for within its beauty, convenience, and allure, lies a deception that we were never warned about. It’s ability to render us useless, make us slaves to all it can provide and perhaps the biggest of all is the lie that it will connect us to all those we love and want.
It has been anything but, rather it has caused sleepless nights as we try to forget the images burned through our brains, the people we could never be, and the things we will never have.
It has been the downfall of many a writer in its wiles of apps to help us create and write down the words lost in our hearts. What about its promise to help you watch your weight? Like it would stop us from wolfing down yet another portion of rice and seasoned chicken.
It’s almost like it’s egging you on.
Reminding you that you can take a picture of that dish and show it to the world. That you can perhaps win at a pretend life even if you don’t have it all.
I remember one of those moments when I had it firmly in my grasp, checking my emails (why do we believe an email may have come in in the seconds it took us to flip through Whatsapp?) and loitering. Apparently, one can loiter in their home.
My brother, probably tired of seeing me walk past him a dozen times finally asked; “Do you always have to be doing something on your phone?”
That day, I had a good reason. I had been using the health app to count my steps and decided to also check some other things. I was killing many birds with this phone, I’m sure the wise ones would approve. I told him this and he looked at me and sighed, like he didn’t believe me.
Yes, there was always a reason. A reason why I needed to have my phone with me, especially in the bathroom, how else would you keep yourself busy while performing the obligatory bowel movement?
But its import doesn’t stop there. My phone was a constant companion even in the midst of those who should matter more. Why talk to them when it can give me all the information I need?
I guess this is what it means to have a love/hate relationship. As I browsed through my Iphone, for the thousandth time, not sure of what I’m searching for but knowing the need to have it in my palm, that constant weight that says ‘all is well’, I can’t help but remember that young woman who was enamored with the pink and white Motorola phone.
If only she could see into the future at what beauty and desire could do. I guess this is a lesson in and of itself that we should not always seek the things we desire.
An insightful scripture comes to mind: “all things are lawful for me but not all things are helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be dominated by anything.” 1 Corinthians 6:12
Surely, you will agree that there was some domination at play and I wasn’t the one with the upper hand.
These days, I am aware of the wiles of this enemy (and friend). While I am no more enamored by its beauty or a need to have new ones, my current phone is over three years old and I plan to continue to use it if it will have me. But, I can’t deny that this phone that has amplified my thirst for distraction has also helped me note my sporadic gems of insight and wisdom. So, it has become one thing that is difficult to flee from, but one which can be a tool of productivity.
today we hear words like digital detox, digital minimalism, and reverting to traditional phones thrown around, and it makes sense. Our mobile devices have become a lot more powerful than we ever thought possible. Yet, the story is not over.
Today, there is a better shift. My phone which used to be friend and foe, all at once, no longer has it’s tentacles in me.
I can go a full day without checking it, and can spend months away from social media. This, I believe is a monumental achievement.
What about you, what’s your story?
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